The following is an account of events leading up to the day of the “March on the Mall,” an event that was led by a person we’ll call The Big Apple. The purpose of the event was to get students united in calling for the removal of President Tessa Martinez Pollack. As stated on the flier; “We are tired of this schools lack of progress!!”

Tuesday, March 20, 1 p.m.:
Location: Main, 2nd floor
Fliers are scattered around the university. The Big Apple personally passes each flier out to unaware students. Students question who The Big Apple is. A little background information concerning The Big Apple reveals that he is, in fact, a humble person calling himself “Mr. President” on his MySpace profile. And his in-your-face attitude is not part of his New York-raised charm but just part of the territory that comes with his position.

3 p.m.:
Location: UWAC, Lake Front office
The Big Apple visits the office of the Lake Front to educate an already educated staff. Seriously, step foot into the student newspaper and throw facts at us as if we don’t already know what’s going on?

Wednesday, March 21, lunch-time:
Students are either clueless about the upcoming “March at the Mall” or are still puzzled by who this “Dr. Pollock” person is. Obviously misspellings aren’t important when it comes to typing out pretty important fliers.

Wednesday, March 22, 4 p.m.
Location: PWSR
During the Student Government Association (SGA) general council meeting, students meet to discuss the current state of the university but more importantly what’s the deal with Flores Lounge.

Thursday, March 23, 12:05 p.m.
Location: UWAC
Lake Front staff observes that The Big Apple has left the UWAC with earpiece and all.

12:07 p.m.
Location: Mall Area
“Does anyone know who Dr. Pollack is? I haven’t seen her, in like, three years,” The Big Apple yells to the gigantic mob that has surrounded him.

12:09 p.m.
Location: Mall Area
“We are your customers and we are unsatisfied. We are calling to the administration,” says The Big Apple. “We are your customers, Dr Pollack, start doing your job!”

12:12 p.m.
Location: Mall Area
“Where’s your absolute aptitude now?” The Big Apple remarks. He may have possibly been alluding to the motto of the university, which consists of “Maximum Aptitude Cultural Attitude.”

12:15p.m.
Location: Mall Area
President Pollack makes an appearance, allows The Big Apple to continue on his soapbox.

12:20 p.m.
Location: Mall Area
“I’m mad because the students are mad,” The Big Apple remarks.

12:25 p.m.
Location: Mall Area
Crowd moves to the free speech zone in back of the UWAC.

12:27 p.m.
Location: UWAC back lawn
“I don’t feel like going to jail today,” The Big Apple says. “I graduate in May.”

12:30 p.m.
Location: UWAC back lawn
Jack Hank, vice president of student life and athletic director, makes an appearance. Coolness has now been restored to the march. The Big Apple mentions to the crowd a conversation he had with Pollack: “She was irate and disappointed (with me).” The Big Apple likely forgot that he cancelled his appointment to meet with her, twice; reason enough to be slightly irate, but not disappointed.

12:35 p.m.
Location: UWAC back lawn
The Big Apple says; “How much was your new flat-screen TV, Dr. Pollack? Your new furniture, your Ralph Lauren paint?”

12:40 p.m.
Location: UWAC back lawn
The Big Apple finally allows the crowd to address their complaints. One woman noted how the dorms have bad maintenance during the weekends and bad food service.

12:51 p.m.
Location: UWAC back lawn
One student comes out with a picket sign reading “Where is the Ice Cream?” He goes on to state that: “I have this sign to show my ignorance and lack of concern behind the protest, and I am a very sarcastic person.”

1 p.m.
Location: UWAC back lawn
The Big Apple says “Is anyone even listening to us?” He goes on to mention the SGA event held later in the day “Keepin’ It Real With Benoist” persuading people to go for the free pizza being offered.

1:07 p.m.
Location: UWAC back lawn
Hank lets The Big Apple know that he can’t be walking around without a microphone.

1:15p.m.
Location: UWAC back lawn
Everything has been dead for the last few minutes; the ESA and STE sausage taco sale is gaining more attention than the protest.

3:20 p.m.
Location: Mall Area
The Big Apple has a petition for students to sign a vote of no confidence from the OLLU community.

5:05 p.m.
Location: PWSR
The Big Apple once again urges those in attendance at the “Keepin’ It Real” event to sign the petition to get a vote of no confidence from the OLLU community.

5:12 p.m.
Location: PWSR
Executive Vice President Howard Benoist (as The Big Apple points out “soon to be former executive vice president) begins the “Keepin’ It Real With Benoist” event. The Big Apple opens up the forum by asking a question on what Benoist’s stance was on the events that occurred earlier in the day. “My feeling about protesting is that it’s part of a series of doing things,” Benoist said. He went on to say that he believes the event was “handled maturely,” although Benoist only saw part of the march.

5:27 p.m.
Location: PWSR
The pizza has finally arrived for the “Keepin’ It Real” event.

5:44 p.m.
Location: PWSR
Benoist answers one of the most exaggerated pieces of information listed on the points of information handout being distributed during the march, whether tuition would be increasing 8 percent. Benoist says the information is “not correct” stating it will increase by only 4 percent.

6:21 p.m.
Location: PWSR
Benoist states that Chief Communications Officer Susan Schleicher will provide answers to the points of the information sheet in the coming days.

9:17 p.m.
Location: Mall Area
The crowds have finally gone. The University Programming Council’s (UPC) Christian concert event is coming to a close in Chapel Auditorium and the drama department’s performance of “The Shape of Things” ended nearly 40 minutes ago. Peace has finally been restored on the campus of OLLU.